A couple of weeks ago I reached out to a friend who I’ve been concerned about for quite a while. When I heard from her I cried a little bit. In spite of some personal difficulties she’s okay. If you would, in your charity, please pray for L.
The book study this week is delayed in part because we had Monday off and it’s thrown the rest of the week off. I love a good three day weekend but oof. And it hasn’t helped that we are soon going to need an ark here in Central Texas. I’m grateful for all the water adding to our water table and bringing reservoir levels up because we need the water, however for some it’s rough, and by rough I mean awful. Please pray for Leticia and her family.
In reading, and rereading Chapter 6: The Idol of Coolness and Sex, and Chapter 7: The Idol of Plans and in teaching over the last couple of weeks there’s been a strong reminder of “this isn’t about me” and when I make “this about me” I lose sight of both the Cross and the people I’m entrusted to my care. It is a hard thing to realize this is where you are, yet again. It is very much again to stepping back and once again looking in that funhouse mirror and accepting this as
your my identity, that this is all about me. It took a full day or to to realize that I’m living in that headspace once again. Oddly enough as I reread that sentence, those words pieced together to form a row with meaning and structure, it becomes clear that what I do is place myself in someones world with a big goldish sign over my head that reads, “worship me! worship me!” Dammit that’s not what I want to do.
On my desk at any given time are 2 planners and a bullet journal. And yet there is a total sense of winging my life. So. Weird. Right! There is a saying I’ve heard for years that sets my teeth on edge, “if you wanna make God laugh tell Him your plans.” I’m beginning to understand what I wanted to write about in another post and why “time is a social construct” does the same. There are so many things about this that I’ll share in another post. What I will say for now is that making good use of our time is a way of honoring God, who gave us time. We can misuse time by not doing anything, not praying, not working towards rightly ordering our day, giving God the first fruits as it were, and on the other end by scheduling so much that we fail to pray, to listen when the Holy Spirit or our Guardian Angel are prompting us in another direction. That planning can become an idol, a disordered attempt to control everything around us. When we give our scheduling to the Lord prayerfully listening perhaps we can shift our use of the time we live in to honor God.
God I do try to Love you.
May this ordinary time fill you with grace and mercy.