Have you ever wanted to thank God for something happening that was kind of rough to deal with in the moment, but deep down you know is the right thing? The title had nothing to do with with that, however it fits and I’m keeping it.
Wednesday, on my way into the City, I started reading On the Other Side of Fear: How I Found Peace by Hallie Lord. Hang tight for a moment I’ll get back to this.
For Advent my sweetie and I are reading A Eucharistic Christmas Advent Meditations on the Presence of Christ just before we have dinner. Last night spoke of keeping a prayer journal, which I’ve done on and off for years. As I read last night the author shared,
“One of the things that’s in there over and over again from those early years is a petition to God to grant me direction concerning my job. To look now and see the work I’m doing – using my writing skills for the Church – it’s very clear that prayer has been answered. And those prayers for direction concerning my job have been replaced by other things on my mind and heart.”
A coincidence? I don’t think so.
As I started reading Hallie’s book thoughts of “that’s me! that’s me! floated through the space between my ears, and drifted to my heart. Hallie shares her fears in some really troubling times, fears that are reasonable given the circumstances. She shares how in the midst of all of their troubling moments her husband reassured her that, as long as they were together, they would be fine. They have each other, and more importantly they have a relationship with God. Does this mean everything will be easy? No. Because the Cross, and the trip to Bethlehem to give birth, and fleeing to Egypt to avoid being murdered by the king of the day.
I’ve been on the receiving end of these same assurances. I’ve given these same assurances. Because the journey is the thing that brings us closer to our spouses, to God, to our neighbor, and to our self. It is these moments that help us discover more of who we are in God.
As quilters there are moments of struggle as we learn how to make a quilt, as we learn new-to-us techniques, trying them over and over again until we get them. Picking and choosing the techniques that make the most sense to us, that give us life, then pursuing them with reckless abandon.
It’s important to remember that whether we’ve been quilting for ten minutes, or 25 years things happen that make us want to bang our heads on the nearest brick wall. And there are things that happen that bring us such unspeakable joy. Every quilter has things happen that are not as pleasant, and fun as we’d like.
When we take stitches, cut fabric, choose patterns, and make stuff – no matter what happens, we’re moving. When we pray, keep a prayer journal, a quilt journal, photos of our quilts, and places that are special to us. We pour our hearts and minds into our quilts making them incredibly personal.
I do have a very specific prayer request, please pray with me for peace, and an openness to wherever God is leading in this moment.
I’m off to spend a little time journaling (pray), finish this sample, be imperfect, and allow God to work in my fears to peace.