At the beginning of August I traveled to Maine to visit with family. With a little over two thousand miles between here and there it’s not quite as easy to see them frequently.
One of my goals in going was to put my feet in the ocean. Goal: unlocked.
The water, chilly.
The breeze, breezy.
The roar, delightful.
The sand in the toes, glorious.
The sun, just warm enough
If I tried putting my toes in the dirt here fire ants would rebel with lightning speed causing great pain.
As I sat to write this morning I remembered it was about this time four years ago I started in Spiritual Direction. This ongoing conversation led to taking 40 plus weeks to work through a 33 week book on the Ignatius exercises. Which I loved and may do again in a while. This also led to a change in how I pray, which is a little more challenging to explain. I am a journal keeper since 7th grade when we had to for one of our classes. I loved it so much I’ve kept it up. Right before I left NY they all got shredded or recycled. One day I’ll do the same with these. In this moment the words aren’t flowing as easily as they have and while this is frustrating I am here for it. For many years the journaling included writing down all the people and situations on my heart. More and more in the last few years – and this is why it’s a little challenging – it’s what I’m thinking in my heart. Further it’s the realization that for many things I don’t know how to pray, so there is a ceding to the Holy Spirit, “I don’t know how to pray for (insert whom ever and whatever here) please pray, You know what is needed more than I ever will.”
Several months ago I took up Morning prayer in the Magnificat and will soon add evening prayer. This is in part out of desire on my part to pray with the Church and is part of becoming a Lay Dominican. There is something beautiful about praying with the Church, joining with so many others praising and honoring God with one voice. Singing the Psalms, reflecting on Scripture and Singing His Praises. There is a deeper knowing that this prayer reflects the ever present moment. As St Elizabeth of the Trinity shares something along the line that this present moment is the beginning of eternity. We live always at the beginning of eternity.
Ahh and this reminds me it’s time to return to Beginning to Pray – Elizabeth of the Trinity. A friend and I are on this tend day retreat through Discerning Hearts Ministries. This is presented in a delightful way.
In June my Sweetie asked me to go back to the gym. I’d taken off for a couple of reasons one annoying and one frustrating. What he said that actually got me to go back is that I was enjoying it. And once again I am. There is a need to be careful not to push to hard to get back to where I was when I left. In my very nature I would do that. Push! Push! Push! is the kind of self-talk I offer myself in these kinds of situations. Spending 30 to 60 minutes on the elliptical offers me the opportunity to honor God through my body in taking care of the gift He’s given me. I’m delighted as at this point in my life I see and experience exercise as a form of prayer.
Back to Maine for a moment there were some delightful moments, there were some challenging moments. All though is grace. One moment though will hold a special place. Not because of what was said, rather because of an unexpected moment of vulnerability. And with a different person a delightful 3 hour conversation over a margarita and dinner. So good.
And finally, a reminder from last years trip.
See you again soon.
God bless,
Teri
A Quilter's Heart 